Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Turds are dog twinkies.

Originally posted on my mySpace blog on 4/20/07. And no, I didn't. I'm a mom now, and not *that* cool of a mom. Sorry. (Actually, no one is sorrier about that than me...)

*Headline courtesy of my husband, Jason, who noticed that our dog Sadie just loves those delightful treats that other dogs leave behind when they traipse through our yard.*

You know, while I was trying to type that, I accidentally typed,"Turds are god's twinkies." And that made me think, "Well, gee, that explains a lot about my life." As the mother of a four year old, the owner of a two year old dog, and the roommate of 2 ten year old cats (you are NEVER the owner of a cat- you are merely its roommate, as the cat will be happy to inform you), I've seen, cleaned, and unfortunately, handled, a *lot* of turds. But if turds are God's twinkies, then my friends, I have surely been blessed.

This week has been quite a whirlwind. Monday afternoon, I left for GSO to take my second professional exam, for which I felt terribly unprepared. Basically, we had to learn a textbook full of medical material on our own. Now I have taken many insurance industry self-study courses before, on every topic imaginable- customer service, regulatory rules, and supervisory skills, just to name a few. I have a long list of acronyms to show for it now- ACS, PCS, AIAA, AIRC, and the mother of them all, FLMI. But the exam I just took was very specific to my current job, and while I passed the first exam, on Risk Selection, last year (all the while feeling as if I failed), this exam was on...medical knowledge.

I deal with more than rudimentary medical knowledge every day as part of the risk selection process as an underwriter, but this textbook was off the hook detailwise. I have so many sources at my fingertips- I don't have to memorize much of this stuff, although it does get stuck in your head after you see it all the time. But seriously, this book went down to minute details. What did they expect us to know? Just an overview, or detailed shit like percentages and exact death rates?

The exam wasn't as bad as it could have been, but I still don't feel great about it. We'll see in about a month whether I passed. It's a paper exam that has to be graded. The good news is that it's not a job requirement- in fact, it's brownie points for me and my other colleagues just to try, as most people in our profession don't pursue professional certification. The bad news is that I tend to be a little Type A when it comes to my job, and always want to do the best possible work, and I will be SOOOO super embarrassed if I fail. Even though my boss is all, "That's ok if you fail- there's always next year. At least you tried." And I'm all, "Noooo!" inside my head, because I just know he will hold it against me, even though he said explicity that he could care less.

Which is really hilarious considering that I am a total non-Type A slob when it comes to my home life. No clean towels? Let's go to Wal-Mart!

Then, Wednesday afternoon, my husband wrenched his knee playing fetch with our dog Sadie. Not being a whiner, he stated that 'it wasn't that bad.' Until the next morning, when he could barely walk. I responded that he was going to the ER, stat. Many hours later, the docs determined that nothing was broken, it was probably a bad sprain, and sent him home with script strength Aleve. But we have to wait a week to know for sure, since our down home ER only has x-rays, not an MRI. And, here's the pisser, he has to stay mostly off of the knee for a whole week. You know what this means? I am in charge of cooking for the family until he is well. Lord help us. I hope they don't revolt after day 4 of faux chicken nuggets and/or fish sticks for lunch! I did order out (pick up 20 miles round trip, so it *was* an effort) Chinese today for meals. Hey, I had to work. And stuff. Now maybe y'all will believe me when I say Jason doesn't work for money, but oh boy, does he ever have a job.
But now that I am done with school and ordering food, I have time to do cool things like watch movies and read for pleasure. Yay!

And also peruse teh intarweb. You should, too. Especially these linkypoos:

http://icanhascheezburger.wordpress.com/
OMG, LOL at dis websit. U cannot resist de cheezburger and catz.

http://www.pandora.com/
I am a Pandora newb, but I love it. And now they are going to take it away from me! Just goes to show- Maybelline did the same thing with my beloved "Wine and Everything" lipstick, those mother fuckers. If you also love internet radio, go here:

http://www.savenetradio.org/

And finally, linky goodness from my Google Reader that shows the complete non sequitur that is my brain:
http://gofugyourself.typepad.com/
http://www.lifehacker.com/
http://slashdot.org/
http://www.dadgonemad.com/
http://ranprieur.com/
http://www.talkingchop.com/
http://www.erinpavlina.com

My brain is a wonderland.
Love, Gabs

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